life

my life for the most point is very depressing. Why is it depressing you ask? well because every since my older sister die, it's been up to me get an education, so that my parents can be proud. it's also now my responsibility to keep my bloodline going. The plan is for me to get married in Vietnam to a girl that my family will choose of course i will look to when I'm in Vietnam. This will take place after I'm done with college, so it's not for awhile, but gives me something to thing about. Am i ok with this plan at first i was like hell no, but because i'm really shy it's getting really hard for me to open up to girls i find myself attracted to. Now i am fine with idea, but I'm still actively looking. My parents really don't like the fact that i'm mostly attracted to Caucasian girls more than Asian girls. My life now is to satisfy my parents expectations of me.